The Good Enoughers

The Good Enoughers. What or who are they?

Well, let me start with this, you don't want to be one. Don't get me wrong, they aren't all bad; after all, they are . . . good enough. But good enough for what and for whom? 

Okay, Good Enoughers are those people in your life who come and go but never really stay. They give the effort required to get what they want (usually from you) but often leave you still wanting (but not necessarily wanting them). They contribute little, but take, take, take. Good Enoughers do more existing than really living. So be careful. They are the energy sapping, heartbreaking, users and abusers in your life.  

To put this in context, let's use a dating analogy. [Disclaimer: Being a man, I've never really experienced this at the hands of another, but I've seen it and even counseled against it.] A male Good Enougher (and they can be women too) exerts an incredible initial effort to woo a woman. But once he "has" her, Mr. Good Enougher resorts to the habits of his former life. When she calls him on his, we'll call it laziness, he straightens up just long enough to earn her good graces again. He knows and says what she wants to hear. Oh he's smooth this one. But little by little he creeps and crawls, some might say slithers, back to neglect and taking her for granted. When she threatens to leave him with a break up, the cycle repeats itself. Eventually though she dumps his sorry butt - hopefully anyhow. At this point I guess you could say he has now transitioned into a "Just Doesn't Get It."

So what happened? Where did he fail? And why? Well he was good enough to "get" her, but not good enough to "keep" her. He was good enough to know her needs, but not good enough to meet her needs. Good enough to make her smile, but not good enough to please her heart. 

“You are good. But it is not enough just to be good. You must be good for something. You must contribute good to the world. The world must be a better place for your presence. And the good that is in you must be spread to others....” ― Gordon B. Hinckley

Good Enoughers again are good. They do try. They give effort. And they do care. But they are more concerned with image. They tend to be selfish. And somehow they never transition into those we want to keep around. Good Enoughers never fulfill their potential because their effort is only enough to get by. They rarely get promotions and raises. They generally aren't risk takers. And where others thrive, Good Enoughers merely survive. Where others dominate, Good Enoughers merely domin . . . um, yea.

Let's take this to the gym now. While some do that extra rep or two or additional set when their body says "no more," Good Enoughers stop short of tired. Where others run through the finish line, Good Enoughers coast through. We'll give them credit of course. They made it to the gym. But at the same time, they live the same amount each time. Run the same distance as the time before. And extra mile is not a part of their vocabulary. In fact Good Enoughers are fluent in adequate, close enough, content, and "eh, I tried."


Another aspect of Good Enoughers: they love routine. They are at their strongest when protected in confines of their comfort zones. They choose to do that what they already know the can. Good Enoughers rarely choose to do Hard Things! 

Now it's confession time. Ugh. I used to be a Good Enougher. Yes, yours truly. I don't make excuses for why I was. It was a part of my life, a part which ceases to exist now. But once I truly discovered myself, I saw this was a part of my life I DID NOT LIKE! I immediately made changes to how I did everything. I stopped the excuses and I began to expect more. But I also started to do more and be more.
 
A Good Enougher plants beans and expects corn. They embody the saying, "Even a steer can try" (I heard this from my dad every time I said I was trying). And they generally get left behind in life, but rarely care. 

Be Good!