Honoring Women

I planned to write an entry on the outstanding men; a kind of positive response to an earlier blog post I wrote on women. But at the moment I am too annoyed because of the callous treatment at the hands of some of these "men" to draft anything resembling complimentary. So this may be a bit redundant, but allow me a moment to honor again the women in my life. As already mentioned, this post will be similar to an earlier blog entry I recently wrote on this topic. We'll consider this entry Part II.

You see, over the years I've listened to some of the most amazing women as they've shared their sorrows and pains due to their ex-husband's selfish involvement in pornography, alcoholism, other related affairs. They've emotionally recounted the physical, emotional, verbal, abuse they endured and most harmful of all, the spiritual anguish they've suffered at the hands of these so-called men . . . and I'm not a bishop. I've sat with them as they related the harmful of effects of uncontrolled anger. One spiritual giant even shared the pain she encountered due to her husband's involvement with prostitution. Yet despite these travails, these women fight on. And while most men clearly aren't guilty of such offenses and some women struggle with these same transgressions, the fact remains these women are the living embodiment of our Savior Jesus Christ. They sacrifice current happiness to ensure their children's future joys - often silently suffering alone. And while they may not forget these nightmares, they do forgive.

Recently I was reading in the Book of Mormon and I came across a scripture I've studied numerous times. But during this reading, these verses caught my attention more so than in readings past. Maybe my mind was more in tune to deep spiritual impressions, because this study was a real eye opener.

In the closing verse of Jacob 2:35, the Nephite men are under condemnation for their various misdeeds. In response to their sinful mistreatment of His precious daughters, Jacob sends forth the following severe chastisement:

"Behold, ye have done greater iniquities than the Lamanites, our brethren. Ye have broken the hearts of your tender wives, and lost the confidence of your children, because of your bad examples before them; and the sobbings of their hearts ascend up to God against you. And because of the strictness of the word of God, which cometh down against you, many hearts died, pierced with deep wounds." Ouch!

Earlier in the chapter, the Lord informs:

"I, the Lord, have seen the sorrow of my people in the land of Jerusalem, yea, and in all the lands of my people, because of the wickedness and abominations of their husbands. And I will not suffer . . . that the cries of the fair daughters of this people . . . shall come up unto me against the men of my people, saith the Lord of Hosts." That last part might appear as though God is defending the men. At first glance it might appear so. But the very next verse clarifies the Lord's statement: "For they shall not lead away captive the daughters of my people because of their tenderness, save I shall visit them with a sore curse, even unto destruction . . ." This destruction isn't going to be visited upon His daughters. So to us men again I say, "Ouch!"

These chastising words are as relevant for the Nephites of old as they are for those in our day. While the transgressions might differ, the plea for repentance remains the same.

"Men, take care not to make women weep, for God counts their tears" (President Thomas S. Monson, Ensign, Nov. 1990, 47). And contrast that warning with a striking one from President Gordon B. Hinckley, "God will hold us accountable if we neglect His daughters" (Ensign, Sept. 1988, 11). I have a feeling that the world's oceans aren't deep enough to hold the tears of all the women hurt by those who should have loved them most.

I am amazed at how many of these remarkable divorcees have emerged stronger, somehow standing taller, and if possible more beautiful from some such fractured marriages. They have developed a more resilient positive outlook for the future, dedicated to serving and honoring God. In many cases they have sacrificed personal happiness for the betterment of their family, friends, and neighbors. I see how incredibly amazing these women are and I am astounded that any man would live a life that would risk hurt one of these sweet souls.

Paul stated, "Neither is the man without the woman, neither the woman without the man in the Lord." Lately though, it seems as though there are plenty of women making a go of it alone, but not by choice.

Perhaps this post is as much a tribute to the many amazing women as it is a challenge to men everywhere (or at least those reading this post) to stand and rise up and be men of God. I further challenge myself to be better than I am and to continue in Christlike treatment of the amazing women in my life. Men, it's time to raise your own personal title of liberty in defense of the women and children in your life.

I can honestly say that I look up to the women in my life. While not physically, definitely in all areas that matter most.


***Out of respect to a commenter, I feel it is important to further stress that in no way is this a commentary on all women - or all men. This was my attempt to recognize the women in my life who are striving to live the best lives they can despite the setbacks they've suffered. I have quite a few male family members and friends who have met and married women who lived lives contrary to God's standards. And the vast majority of men are amazing fathers, husbands, brothers, and so forth (I consider myself one and look forward to being a better husband and father in the future). This post may have been a bit strong.